|
Post by Firestar on May 4, 2010 16:22:42 GMT -5
A married couple is driving along a highway doing a steady 60 miles per hour. The wife is behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks across at her and speaks in a clear voice. 'I know we've been married for twenty years, but I want a divorce.'
The wife says nothing, Keeps looking at the road ahead but slowly increases her speed to 65 mph. The husband speaks again. 'I don't want you to try and talk me out of it, ' He says, 'because I've been having an affair with your best friend, And she's a far better lover than you are.'
Again the wife stays quiet, But grips the steering wheel more tightly and slowly increases the speed to 75 . He pushes his luck. 'I want the house,' he says insistently. .
Up to 80. 'I want the car, too,' he continues.
85 mph. 'And,' he says, 'I'll have the bank accounts, all the credit cards and the boat!'
The car slowly starts veering towards a massive concrete bridge. This makes him nervous, so he asks her, 'Isn't there anything you want?'
The wife at last replies in a quiet and controlled voice. 'No, I've got everything I need,' she says. 'Oh, really,' he inquires, 'so what have you got?'
Just before they slam into the wall at 85 mph, The wife turns to him and smiles. 'The airbag.'
|
|
|
Post by Captain Gojira on May 5, 2010 21:57:05 GMT -5
Well, that's what you get for driving a Toyota, the one car that supports natural selection
|
|
|
Post by Shagrath on May 6, 2010 8:03:07 GMT -5
Personally, I think this statement is funnier than the original joke. Although that was amusing as well.
|
|
|
Post by Still Churchill on May 25, 2010 1:16:52 GMT -5
What's funnier is that if this were true, and she did hit the wall at 85, even with the airbag she would still die because her organs would not be able to handle a change like 85 to 0 mph in inertia, and she would be dead too. Oh, women who think they're so much smarter than men.
|
|
|
Post by Shagrath on May 25, 2010 20:32:33 GMT -5
Well hey. Churchill, dude. You gotta understand. Women bleed for a week straight without dying. They break the laws of physics by just merely existing. who knows hat else they're capable of.
|
|
|
Post by Still Churchill on May 26, 2010 1:13:16 GMT -5
That's a generally accepted fact, the bleeding part. However, it's still impossible for any living being with organs in them to take that abrupt a change in momentum. It would kill them. So, the joke is still on the woman who thought she wouldn't die because she had an airbag. Being over-analytical can make you feel like a jackass sometimes.
|
|
|
Post by Shagrath on May 26, 2010 10:29:39 GMT -5
Yes, yes it does. And you clearly missed the sarcasm of the last post unfortunately. Or just decided to ignore it. One of the two.
|
|
|
Post by Wke113 on May 26, 2010 16:11:18 GMT -5
You sound exactly like my friend Abberation, and I'm going with the ignoring part.
As for the joke a lot of jokes when you analyze it don't really make sense or defies the laws of physics. I've learned just to accept them its easier and funnier that way; Same goes for movies Mythbusters has proved that a number of times.
|
|
|
Post by Still Churchill on May 26, 2010 21:25:47 GMT -5
Yes, yes it does. And you clearly missed the sarcasm of the last post unfortunately. Or just decided to ignore it. One of the two. Well, I had already completly over-analyzed a joke, so I couldn't really let the little sarcasm get by me too. Forgive me?
|
|
|
Post by Shagrath on May 26, 2010 22:52:41 GMT -5
Yes, yes it does. And you clearly missed the sarcasm of the last post unfortunately. Or just decided to ignore it. One of the two. Well, I had already completly over-analyzed a joke, so I couldn't really let the little sarcasm get by me too. Forgive me? Only with some high quality blood shed, acts of cannibalism and a little good old fashioned martyrdom. Then I'll consider it. : D
|
|
|
Post by Still Churchill on May 27, 2010 16:37:59 GMT -5
Well, I had already completly over-analyzed a joke, so I couldn't really let the little sarcasm get by me too. Forgive me? Only with some high quality blood shed, acts of cannibalism and a little good old fashioned martyrdom. Then I'll consider it. : D Shit, that sounds like an average day for me.
|
|
ichigosoul23
Blooded
Yes... I drew this|--|Default
Posts: 68
|
Post by ichigosoul23 on May 30, 2010 11:56:43 GMT -5
omg that is so terrible!! that guy so deserved to die if you tell me now why in the world would he make it worse by pushing and pushing GEEZ men are so stupid lol
funny joke yo!
|
|
|
Post by Shagrath on May 31, 2010 7:57:57 GMT -5
Only with some high quality blood shed, acts of cannibalism and a little good old fashioned martyrdom. Then I'll consider it. : D Shit, that sounds like an average day for me. Then it shouldn't be that hard to make it up to me I suppose.
|
|