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Post by Reborned Predator on Sept 17, 2006 18:41:53 GMT -5
Falling into darkness, I am blinded. I grab onto what ever I can reach, but I am still pulled down into darkness. I now can only accept this darkness into my life, and no light can find me. I am falling, falling fast. There is no ground to fall onto, just a never-ending hole of darkness. Will I ever see light? No I will not. But I will do what I was made to do. To fall into darkness, to be consumed. I am a fallen angel, that has no memory. I am of the dark.
This is pretty much how I feel right now. Any feedback?
P.S. Just if your wondering, don't petty me, don't show sympathy toward me. For this strange void that I am falling into is what I chose. So please don't think I'm looking for attention. I just heard that this was like really strong and deep (of course, I made it). So I just hope you'll enjoy it.
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Post by meshinga on Sept 17, 2006 18:47:30 GMT -5
I like it...
Though to me it seems the word darkness is overused, though poetry is just expression through any words you can grasp that come from your heart. So, I like it ^^ Its expressive. Nice.
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Post by Reborned Predator on Sept 17, 2006 18:49:24 GMT -5
thanks. I'm really good at expressing my-self and feelings. So I just didn't write this for shits if you know what I mean. But thanks for your comment
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Post by meshinga on Sept 17, 2006 18:55:44 GMT -5
No problems, expression is good, especially by poetry or angry rant writings >  |
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Post by Stone Heart on Sept 17, 2006 23:24:07 GMT -5
Definately expressive. But yes, the name doesn't quite fit the poem.
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Post by Reborned Predator on Sept 18, 2006 18:49:28 GMT -5
well, what kinda name would you have for this?
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Post by Stone Heart on Sept 18, 2006 23:40:04 GMT -5
To be truthful, soething among the lines of Falling. The word Falling would actually go good since you talked about falling so much.
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guanhchak
Blooded
Death Before Dishonor|--|Blue
Posts: 73
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Post by guanhchak on Sept 19, 2006 9:00:18 GMT -5
lmao... all I find wrong is the over use of darkness, shadows and blackness could be substituted for a few darknesses in their x3 other than that it's a beatiful poem, better than I can write, I just draw.
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Post by Stone Heart on Sept 22, 2006 0:49:36 GMT -5
Yeah, same here. All I can do is draw, so you did quite a good job, Reborned.
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Post by Frost on Oct 11, 2006 22:45:50 GMT -5
I like it... its emotional... Really nice.
I must admit that it reminds me of me in my distant past.
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Post by the lonely soldier 714 on Feb 9, 2007 5:57:16 GMT -5
that's the best poem i ever heard. it reminds me of some of my ex girls' poems.
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Post by Tundra on Oct 12, 2007 7:50:03 GMT -5
You do know you can't really just post something You wrote in this thread right? Please make your own thread where you can post stuff that You wrote. This is Reborned's poetry thread, not yours. |
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Post by hardkoreusmc on Oct 12, 2007 10:31:00 GMT -5
You do know you can't really just post something You wrote in this thread right? Please make your own thread where you can post stuff that You wrote. This is Reborned's poetry thread, not yours. Well I'm sorry if he failed to specify if he wanted only his works being posted here, I interpreted this thread as being an open/share your most gloomy stuff and that is hence why I posted.  The title of the thread is "Poetry: Darkness" and makes no refference to what he wants. Further more he doesn't make known his intentions or if he wants or does not was other people's work. Granted I could have asked or something, but I felt the thread to be an open one; not a Reborned Predator poetry portfolio thread. So in light of this, you do know you can't "get on me" for this. I will gladly delete both my posts from this thread and place my fabricated work on dA (already have, with some modifications). It's ended up one of my best non-violent works. |
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